


What You Need

by chelseawinchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Depression Trigger, F/M, Panic attack trigger, anxiety trigger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-11 05:24:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8955763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chelseawinchester/pseuds/chelseawinchester





	

“Please, just leave me alone, I don’t want to talk to anyone right now.” You had locked yourself in yours and Sam’s room, leaving him in the hallway, asking you to open the door. The last few days had been rough; you weren’t sure why, but you were feeling down. There hadn’t been a bad hunt, you and Sam weren’t going through a tough patch--you just felt shitty. 

You sat on your bed, not moving, your legs crossed, hands in your lap. You weren’t crying, you were just sitting. There was a feeling, one that you could only describe as empty, though that’s not quite what it was, that filled you. It was awful--you’d rather feel sad or angry than feel whatever it was that you felt.

Eventually Sam gave up trying to get you to let him in. You heard him walk away, defeated. You didn’t like pushing him away, but this was just so hard to describe to people. You couldn’t explain why this was happening, and that’s what you didn’t think he’d understand. You felt crazy just knowing you didn’t have a reason to feel like this, so you thought another person would find you insane for it.

Of course Sam was much more understanding than other people, but you worried about the possibility that he would look at you differently. That he wouldn’t want to be with you anymore. Yes, you knew it was nuts. This was Sam. He would never do that. But there was a little sliver of doubt that forced you to keep this to yourself. 

Suddenly, the empty feeling faded and guilt washed over you. Guilt for not trusting Sam with this. Guilt for not letting him be with you. You walked to the door, almost turning the knob, but you couldn’t do it. You didn’t want to see his face when you told him you were messed up.

Suddenly you started crying. The sadness you wished for was present, causing tears to fall down your face and forcing sporadic sobs from your chest. You slid down to the floor, your back against the door, and curled into a ball. 

Someone walked up to the door again. _Sam_. “Y/N, are you okay?” he asked, his voice soft. You tried to answer, but you only cried harder. You were sure Sam heard you because he tried to open the door again. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to talk, but I want you to know I’m here.”

He didn’t budge. When you calmed down slightly, you stood up and unlocked the door. It was loud enough that Sam would know he could come in now, which is exactly what he did. He grabbed you in his arms immediately, knowing what you needed without even asking. He sat on your bed with you in his lap, letting you get the rest of your tears out. Sam didn’t ask you what was wrong, he just sat there with you. That’s all you needed. He knew you would talk when you were ready to talk, no matter how long that would be.

About ten minutes later, you were done crying, and you just laid with Sam. Then you started speaking. “I don’t know what it is. It just happens sometimes. There’s no reason for it. It’s not you, Sam, just me. I guess I’m just screwed up.”

“Y/N, you are not screwed up. You’re still perfect, okay?”

“But…”

“No. You are amazing,” Sam insisted.

You nodded. Sam reacted better than you could’ve imagined. He was perfect; he would never judge you because of this, and that was all the comfort you needed for now. That might change later, but you had someone who was there for you, and that was most important.


End file.
